Dis-Equilibrium

So yeah...pretty epic fail I know..it's been about 2 weeks?? hahaha I think it's safe to say I will not be neccissarily writting a blog everyday, however, that doesnt mean I'm not thankful for something everyday it simply means I cant post everyday, espcially since my laptop once again has something wrong with it and other people use the main computer in my house so sorry about that. But I got a good topic today if I do say so myself hahaha

So I'm taking this child development class and one of the things my teacher taught us yesterday really stuck out to me. Well you know when a child is really young they soak up so much information in such a small amount of time especially within the first few years. So in their minds there is two stages that they go through when experiencing the world. Equilibrium and Dis-equilibrium.

Equilibrium is when everything makes sense to them and everything is perfect in the world, and dis-equilibrium if you can guess is when they are lost and confused and things are out of wack to them. The example she gave is that when she taught her 2 year old son what a doggy was, he had to learn that it had 4 legs, 2 ears, it was furry, and it had a tail...and the 2 year old was cool with this, he was in equilibrium because the world made sense. Then he went on a walk and saw a cat for the first time and he turned to his mom and said "look mommy a doggy!"....and when that 2 year old heard his mom say "No baby thats not a doggy that's a cat" the 2 year old (in his mind) went a lil crazy. In his mind all he's thinking is "what, what are you talking about, what the heck's a cat?! No! 4 legs, 2 ears, furry, and has a tail THAT'S A DOG! Now you say its a cat..whaaaat??!" ...the kids in dis-equilibrium because something doesn't make sense, and children go back and forth between equilibrium and dis-equilibrium soo often literally every minute this happens when they are little and learning all these things about the world. Now before you go feeling bad for them cause they are constanly confused and thrown off course with life's curve balls. This next part is what cuaght my attention. She said that in these moments of confusion and dis-equilibrium, with the proper guidance from parents, these are the moments where the child learns the most! When the child has no challenges and is in easy equilibrium it's not learning! These moments of confusion are where the child can learn some of the biggest things and this is where their understanding of the world is greatly enhanced (again with the proper guidance).

What was funny to me is that....as I thought about it I realized this doesnt end after the age of 5. YUP! Hear I go bringing faith, and life, and God into it! hahahaha I mean seriously though life.....it sucks sometimes. It's not always going to make sense, you're not always going to get a clear answer. Things and people are going to hurt you. But it's in these moments of confusion and hurt and being lost that we have the opportunity to grow and learn so much about life, and even to learn so much about ourselves. When life is easy peezy lemon squeezy, sure it's a lot more enjoyable and definitly appreciate those times and make the best of them, but there is also something to appreciate about the not so easy moments life gives us.

Here's the difference though bewteeen a 2 year old going through dis-equilibrium and an older kid or adult going through it. Remember the child can learn so much if given the proper guidance by the parents. However, when you're a teen, or a young adult or older getting that "proper guidance" is really up to you. I'm pretty sure I've said this before considering its somehting I really believe...Happiness is mostly a choice. Yes things cause us to feel a certain way but only for a small amount of time and after that it's up to us if we hang on to that feeling or not. Why would you want to hang on to anger, or sadness, or jealousy, or anything other than happiness?? When life doesnt make sense and you feel you're going slightly insane, it's up to you if you want to stop being sad and confused. You CAN NOT always solve the problem, but you can change how you think about the problem. Reorganize priorities and remember what's important in your life. Take that opportunity to grow and learn and change for the better. Take that opportunity that comes with EVERY fall in life.

So if you're going through a confusing time and things are not making sense at all and you wanna call a cat a dog haha.....look for that guidance, for that peace. I cant tell you who that "proper guidance" is...maybe it's a person you look up to who is hopefuly a good role model. I personally think music can sometimes be the proper guidance in some cases, you know you hear a song and remember whats important in life it's great haha...not that anyone asked but call me corny but God has always proven to be a pretty good "proper guidance" type person in my life. Faith is what gets me through but again I have to go find it and sometimes I dont wanna fidn it (that would be the stubborn 2 year talking hahah) but eventually I knwo that I want to find peace of mind and I know that there are certain peopel in my life that I can go to, and they alwasy point me back to my faith....I've grown a lot because of them but I've really grown a lot because of all the things I've had to over come in life....you're gonna be ok, you'll get that equilibrium and you're going to be stronger because of it, just keep the faith :)   

Do Not Be Afraid I Am With You

Not to much explanation today on exactly why I'm thankful for this song, it's one of those either you know the story or you dont. And if you want to know the story you can ask me yourself. But today I am thankful for a specific moment in my life and this song is a huge part of that moment so hope you enjoy.

You ever have that moment where you finally give up trying to fix everything in your life by yourself and realize you can't do it alone? And not like, asking someone else for help but rather accepting that you have to let God do his thing and just trust him? Even though letting go is good for you and it's really good when you realize that sometimes there's nothing more you can do, however, it is also very scary to let go because you don't know what's going to happen. In the back of your head you feel things are always gonna be bad and maybe even get worse. It's one of those "I have no idea where to go from here" type of moments, it's also the moment where you usually feel the most alone.

It's funny though in my expereince both personally and also through watching other people I've learned that when you're at your rock bottom moments and you feel SOOO far away from God and everything else.....ironicaly those are the moments you are closest to Him. I think this is because at these moments we accept that we have no control sometimes, and we accept that we need something else, something beyond what we can attain for ourselves. Something like faith. I feel many people miss the opportunity to feel God because they get caught up in the frustration but when you are at these moments try praying, and you'd be surprised I think. At these moments it's nice to hear things like "Do not be afraid, I am with you" or "I love you"....This song is one of the very few if not only songs that I have heard, that is from the perspective of God. It sounds like God himself is talking to you in the song. I heard this song for the first time while I was in one of these moments and I believe that was more than a coincidence. I hope while reading the lyrics to the song you take it as a prayer, just make sure you're in a silent place and truly think about what the song is saying and maybe or hopefully I should say it can help you where ever you're at in life right now.

I will come to you in the silence
I will lift you from all your fear
You will hear My voice
I claim you as My choice
Be still, and know I am near

I am hope for all who are hopeless
I am eyes for all who long to see
In the shadows of the night,
I will be your light
Come and rest in Me

Do not be afraid, I am with you
I have called you each by name
Come and follow Me
I will bring you home
I love you and you are mine

I am strength for all the despairing
Healing for the ones who dwell in shame
All the blind will see, the lame will all run free
And all will know My name

Do not be afraid, I am with you
I have called you each by name
Come and follow Me
I will bring you home
I love you and you are mine

I am the Word that leads all to freedom
I am the peace the world cannot give
I will call your name, embracing all your pain
Stand up, now, walk, and live

Do not be afraid, I am with you
I have called you each by name
Come and follow Me
I will bring you home
I love you and you are mine

CHALLENGE: There are many pleasures in life that promise happiness, but all of those usually have an expiration date. And when those limited pleasures are gone we are left right at the beginning feeling like we need something more to be happy. This song reminds me that God is always there and that in the end if God is not in my life then nothing will ever quench my desire to be happy. Not to say that other things cant make us happy however I feel when Im good on my faith, I realize way more reasons to be happy and it's a better kind of happy than when Im not good with my faith if that makes sense? Basically God is the only one who can do all the things that the song says...and at those moments where we feel alone and confused and scared....just remember to not be afraid, cause he's always there.  

My Peer Leaders

So a big theme this year before the actual retreat happened was focusing on who the "lights" in your life were. And honestly before any retreat I always start to think about my retreat as a student and why it was I came back and who was there and just think back on the good times I guess haha infact about 3 weeks before the retreat I always start playing my 2nd year retreat CD just to get me in the right mood lol

I am thankful for the group of peer leaders I had when I was a confirmation student. At the time obviously I didn't know all the work they had to do and all the preperation but every year I come back to help I am reminded of how much they had to do for my retreat. It really is impossible for me to get through a retreat with out thinking about my own retreat and all the peer leaders that were there for me back then. Most of them are no longer working retreats but that doesnt mean they are not in my life anymore. I pretty much talk to all of them still maybe a few out of the entire team back then that I don't somehow still have contact with.

See everyyear there is a new group of people that come back to be peer leaders and they are always great and every year it feels I find a new reason to stay and help and I always meet people that give my faith a boost and just keep me on track but it all began with my peer leaders back in the day hahha they took the time out of their lives to come back and share with us and they were just the coolest kids ever in my opinion at the time lol so I really want to take the time to appreciate them and aknowledge them and all they did no matter where they are now. I can confidently say 5 years later that I will NEVER forget anything about my second year retreat and all the amazing people that helped with it.

Even though we're not allowed back because they think we might have stolen something (long story ask if you really wanna know lol) Julian will always be one of my top favorite places in the world! That's where we had my retreat by the way ahhah it was such a great place! There was a "talk room" then right next to it was a "Music" room an entire room just to do the music stuff, then not to far away was a rec room that had a pool table and a foosball table AND a ping pong table I believe and that was the "arts and crafts" room, then of course a kitchen and again not to far down they had a football field where we played soccer on free time hahaha It honestly was a great place that someday I want to go back and visit.

One of the greatest things about my peer leaders....is that they're still my peer leaders hahahah well we all grew up and we're not 16,17, or 18 anymore now we're all 21, 23, or 24 now but some of them are still active in church and so I see them all the time, or again I just still keep in contact with them. I still look up to them and ok I'll admit it....I still think they are some of the coolest people on the planet! hahaha I know they will always be there for me cause over the years they have been there for me when stuff has happened. They still are some of the first people I go to if I need someone to talk too and if you ask me they are still some of the BEST role models a person could ask for. I trully am lucky and I truly feel blessed to have had those people as peer leaders, and as friends. I'm happy they still are important in my life and I have a feeling no matter where life takes us they will ALWAYS be my peer leaders and I will always love them and I think I can confidently say they will always love me too.

(So there was A LOT more peer leaders that this blog is talking about but this is the only picture I had on hand from my retreat sorry ahha...these were the group leaders on my retreat but yes A LOT of people are missing from the entire team again sorry but I thought this was a nice picture anyways haha)

CHALLENGE: I have a lot of blogs about friends and how you should take the time to appreciate them so I'm hoping you get the message pretty clearly now. People come and go in your life and that is NOT a bad thing and people who may not be in your life anymore that doesnt make them bad people or bad friends. However, there is something to be said about the people who have been in your life for a long time, who no matter what happened always kept in touch somehow. Just as always with everyone who is important to you...remember to show them you care and that you're thankful for them every now and then haha

Sick Again

Ok so I know I have been failing big time this past week with this blog I'm sorry, the day I got back from retreat I got really sick and just havn't really remembered to post something, but I'm on orders to not get out of bed today so I will be posting probably a few today to try to make up for the ones I have missed.

So right off the bat I want to start today with a similar one that I have posted before about being sick. If you read the other one than yes this might seem redundant so you can stop reading if you'd like haha. If you have not read the other one about being sick then let me explain why I am thankful for it. Now I don't think saying I'm thankful for being sick is the right way to put it because I don't like bieng sick at all!! However I cant lie, it is nice to have people take care of you :)

And again just like in the other post, when I say everyone I mean EVERYONE! For example today my mom actually told me to stay in bed all day and rest not to even try to do anything around the house. She told me to call work and tell them I cant go and yesterday she told me not to go to school.....now maybe for some of you this sounds normal of a parent when a child is sick but the thing is that has NEVER happened before here lol. Normally they dont believe that I am as sick as I say I am and they get mad if I have to skip school cause im "sick". You know the "suck it up" type of thing hahahha but this time they are actually being very nice about it hahahha

Even my dad seems to have more patience with me cause when i get sick I swear I know more about medicine that he does even though he's the doctor hahahha. Well not really only when it comes to allergy medicine he tries to give me. I dont know what it is about allergy medicine but I do not like taking it, I'll take anything else he gives me but the second he says take this allergy pill Im like "woah why??!!?" it's weird hahah but he just goes along with me lol

CHALLENGE: The real challenge is to no get sick this season cause honestly it feels like everyone is sick so all I can say is I hope you dont get sick and if you already are sick then I hope you get better soon!

It's the little things

Today what I'm thankful for reminds me that, the things you are thankful for don't have to be big things, or even deep emotional things. Sometimes the things that make you the happiest person are the smaller thinsg in life and sometimes they are so small that unfortunatley we over look them and forget to realy look back and thank God for that moment.

Tonight I went to a friends soccer game. It was sooooo cold and I was already a little sick to begin with so honeslty I think it just made me worse! However, it was a lot of fun with friends and his family watching him play. Even though we were cold, we still made the best of the situation and well we won, or he won cuz we werent playing but you know what I mean. If I could write down all the funny thinsg that were said I would but it really as as simple as, I had a great time and laughed a lot.

That's what I'm thankful for, sweet and simple, no life lesson, just a small part of my day that made me smile and laugh. And lets be honest no matter how small the moment may be if it made you smile and laugh then that's enough to be thankful for it. It's the little things in life that make us the happiest and yet it's the little things that we over look all the time.

CHALLENGE: It's funny when I sit here to write my blog, I usually look back and reflect on my day to see what stands out as something I want to write about. Thing is, no matter how many things get me upset or annoy me or make me sad during the day, because of this blog when I sit down at the end of the day to think I force myself to focus on the good because well I have to for the blog hahah. And no matter how my day was, when I sit here and think of all the good things that happened and made me happy, I kind of completely forget about all the things that might have made me "not happy". I don't know if I'm explaining myself the rigth way but basically before you go to bed at night try to look back on your day to all the good things that happened and only focus on those, you'd be surprised how you start to realize that life is good, and appreciate the little things.

YAG!! :D

Today I have a special shout out to my yaggers....some of you have NO IDEA who I'm talking bout. So I'll explain for ya! At my church we have the Youth Group, which is for kids in high school to hang out and have fun with some spiritual growth obviously. But a few years ago one of the confirmation teachers, Toni, decided that those kids who were out of high school but still really involved at church needed there own space. Youth Group is a great program but it tailers to high school kids with mostly high school problems. So she knew the young adults needed a program that was more "grown up" in the issues they talked about and addressed more adult problems or the same problem just in a more mature way. So she started the Young Adult Group hence..YAG lol creative I know hahah so might as well give you the rest of the history, after running it for a little over a year Toni stepped down and Theresa took over as person in charge of running YAG and person who organizes the young adults for events and such. Well a few weeks ago Theresa announced that she is going back to school and will not be free to attend YAG anymore and even though we are all very sad cause it really wont be the same with out her, we are all also very proud of her and wish her all the best. Plus we will still see her at church so she really isnt "leaving" hahaha

So now that Theresa has also stepped down she left YAG to two young woman. Trisha and myself will be teaming up to run YAG and hopefully we can do half of the amazing job that Toni and Theresa have done in the past :)

But I would like to take this moment to say how thankful I am to this young adult group, at the beginning I was extremely reluctant to join especially since there was a few people who I did not know and at the time I was the youngest member for about 2 years. But quickly I came to love it. It honeslty has helped me a lot in understanding things in a differnt way and I can honeslty say I have never really read and talked about and tried to understand the bible before YAG. To some it may seem like, ANOTHER THING FOR CHURCH??!! but for me it's more of a midweek time with God, cause even though idealy we should make time for him each day but life can get hectic and I love my midweek OLG visits hahah.

Plus the people there I must say are pretty dang awesome!! I am no longer the youngest won! lol and I know I can go to them whenever I need them and it's not just a group i go to, it's another family and you can never have to much family in your life haha

So I am thankful for YAG and how it helps me, I am thankful that Toni realized the young adults needed a place to go, I am thankful for all Theresa has done to help the program grow stronger, and I am terrified at "taking over" hahahah but at the same time thankful and humbled that Theresa and the other "yaggers" trust Trisha and myself with such a responsibility.

This is way back in the old school days of YAG when we would meet at Theresa's house lol ok so not THAT long ago but still!! lol love this people! <3

CHALLENGE: I mentioned it real quickly in this blog, but it is really important. Do you give God a good amount of you life, year, month, week, day even?? If yes, then good for you, if you're like me and can honeslty admit that no you dont then thats my challenge not just for this blog but for this lent. Yag helped me with having one hour in the middle of the week to think about God and pray and at the same time a mid week hangout with some of my best friends every week (you know our motto lol) So find a way to give God a few hours a week, just to say thank you, and honeslty to give yourself that one hour of peace away from the rest of your life to just think, it honeslty can not hurt but only help. :) 

Today My Life Begins

Oh boy...so this past weekend was the 2nd year confirmation retreat which is why I did not post anything, and then yesterday I was just way to tired to post a blog for it sorry haha.

I can not even start to explain how thankful I am for this past weekend, again it's one of those things that I can try to explain but you will never fully understand the feeling unless you see for yourself. All I can say is that this is one of the most amazing retreats ever! I mean I've gone on so many retreats you almost feel like you've seen it all, but then you see a group of  big tough guys that have been fighting us all year in confirmation classes, actually start to pray over each other and cry and hug each other and you just realize God will never stop amazing you. Every retreat has it's specialness to it but I really feel like this retreat was extra special for some reason.

Out of respect for the students and even peer leaders who I saw experience many things this weekend, I cant go into detail but I really did see miracles happen this weekend. It's always amazing to see the difference in people from the moment they step off the bus to getting back on the bus two days later as completely different people. Like the one thing I can say because it really does make me feel very happy and proud for what I do as a junior minister. When everyone became friends on facebook after the retreat you know I went on a few of the students pages and it's just hard to exlpain what it feels like to see that the day before retreat there post are so negative and cursing the world for everything and some even talking smack on the retreat they havnt been on...and then sunday night there post are 200% changed! Now they seem so much happier and excited for life, like they have a new found hope....I love it!

These kids give a whole new meaning to the idea of never giving up on a person hahah if any of you are reading this, you know I love you all but you honeslty are a stubborn group lol you all were soo sure you were gonna hate the retreat and it was hard to stay strong when most of you showed not only no interest but at times, some of you pushed us away HARD and with attitude. But again our faith and our hope of what you would hopefully understand is what kept us strong and we never gave up on you guys and we never will!

I'm so happy beyond words that the students really got something amazing out of this retreat. All the hard work and exhaustion and all nighters...they all dont matter in the end when all the students talk about how they had a great experience. To see them so thankful and happy, makes everything so worth it!!

I could literally go on FOREVER!! about how much this retreat ment to me and all the things I was thankful for but I'll save the little thankful stories for other posts haha....I have a feeling the next week or so of posts are going to somehow be about the retreat cause there is just way to much to be thankful for about it to shove it into one post so I'll spread it out more haha.

CHALLENGE: This is more for the people who went on retreat....Never lose what you found this weekend. Hold on to that feeling of hope and faith and love. Unfortunatley retreats cant last forever, and we have to go home and we don't know what exactly everyone has to go home too. Help each other stay strong, and remember you can always start again and God will always be there for you.

Technology

So you know it's true what they say...you don't really appreciate something till it's gone. Now I'm sure someday I will learn this lesson in a deeper way (plus I have already learned this lesson the hard way), but I'm not gonna lie today I was reminded of this lesson in a very superficial way. So early this morning my phone decided to just not work anymore....it would tell me if I had a new text, and if someone called it would let me know, however, I could not answer the call, could not see the text, could not respond to it, and could not make any text. Basically, it was mocking me with the fact that people were trying to reach me and there was nothing I could do about it hahahah

It's kind of a two part thankful post, because 1- I still don't have a phone that works at the moment, but I do know I appreciate my phone when I do have it. Again I know this seems very materialistic of me but it's true, I love talking and texting with my friends during the day and it keeps me entertained. Im not obsessed with technology but I do see its beauty lol.

The second part is that I'm thankful that I can use my ipod as a phone if I choose too. Yes there were a few people who I simply wanted to talk to, but considering the retreat is a day away, there are a lot of people I need to be in contact with texting and calling through out the day to make sure everything is being taken care of and finishing last minute things you know? So im thankful I had a back-up even if it was limited because I had no contacts but I found a way to get a few of them that I needed haha. Plus my mom was worried when I wouldnt answer my phone so when I finally remembered my ipod was also a phone she was thankful to hear that I was ok and nothing was wrong hahah

CHALLENGE: I've said this before but it doesnt hurt to remind you. Don't take things like your phone, or car, or laptop for granted. Yes we live in a society where it is normal for people to have these things everywhere, but that doesnt mean we should act as if they are non important. Think about how much you use these things and im not saying it in a bad way Im just pointing out that technology and our ability to have this technology in our lives is something we should be thankful for. And we should take care of our things and not be spoiled and throw these things around knowing we can "just get another one".....cause maybe you wont be able to. Basically and hopefully on a "deeper" level hahah be thankful for how blessed you are for all that you have and remember that these luxuries like cars (no matter how old) and cell phones (even if it's not the "coolest") are infact luxuries and not everyone necessarily has them.

My Job and Lent

Today I am thankful for my job haha...yes I know what you're all thinking because EVERYONE has the same reaction.. "YOU WORK??!!??"...

Yes I work part time at this after school thing for elementary kids. I help them with homework do some tutoring and then watch them till their parents pick them up basically a day care. But I am thankful that is where I work becuase these are some of the funniest and sweetest kids ever! They draw pictures for me, when we walk to the park they pick flowers for me and they are honestly great kids. Of course every now and then me or one of the other girls has to "deal" with one or two if they get out of hand or need to be talked to but even then they are still a great kids. And im not gonna lie at first it was weird but now I kinda like being called "Miss Daniela" hahahha even though they are getting to the point where they feel comfortabe enough to just call me Daniela but still...it's all good haha

CHALLENGE: So today's challenge has nothing to do with my story haha. Tomorrow lent starts and I just wanted to say a few things to those of you who like me take it seriously and give something up. First of all, you dont always have to give something up for lent you could also do something for it. As in everyday do a good deed, or go to church every sunday or whatever. Every year I hear what people give up and sometimes I feel like people don't really get the purpose of lent. The purpose is not to help you lose weight. Jesus didn't die on the cross so you could get a 40 day miracle diet and give up a bunch of food. hahah (sorry if that was mean) ha but it's true. I dont care what you give up, but in my personal opinion you should be giving up something that will honestly help better your life in some way nad even though eating better falls under that category the key is that it should also help bring you closer to God and your faith. To me lent is all about our faith and what can we do to make it stronger. What can I give up to help me focus more on my relationship with God. Sure there are a few things im giving up more as a challenge and just for fun, one of then being sarcasm haha but there are also other thinsg im doing this lent to truly help me be a better person in all parts of life uncluding and most important in my faith. So if you're doing lent I challenge you to really think of what maybe be getting in the way of your faith and what can you do or give up this lent to truly work on your faith.

Music Doesn't Get "Old"

Alright so todays post is very light hearted. Well, light hearted however, still very important to me. Today I have to say I am thankful when a friend, or anyone really, introduces me to a different type of music, or a new artist or just something I'd never heard before. 

It's very rare that we as humans get to truly experince new things, that's why whenever we do it's such a great feeling because it's not something that happens often, we get stuck in a routine or we become afraid to get out of our comfort zones. Also let's face it we can all be jaded at time and not appreciate amazing things simply because we see them all the time. So when someone shows me a new song....I absolutely love it, especially if it's a great song too haha. Even though I have heard music all my life and I have heard amazing music before (in my opinion) whenever I hear a new song that I love, it really is a great new experience I get to enjoy. That's one of the great things about music, sure you've heard a guitar before, and you've heard people sing before but every song is different in it's own way and can be experienced for the first time by many people.

But yeah, today I am very thankful and I love it when people introduce me to new music and new artists and the great thing about me (cuz that didnt sound conceded lol) is that I genuinely love all kinds of music INCLUDING country! lol I listen and appreciate ANY type of music if I like the song I like it and I really don't care who sings it. It's not about genre or artist to me...its simply about the song and if i like it and if it calls to me haha. If you look at my ipod you would be so confused and you could not even begin to guess what kind of person owns it cause it has random combination of music but again I love it...always something new to hear.

So if you have a favorite song, artist, or style of music no matter what it is and no matter how many people you know hate it...let me know I really do love hearing new music (and new doesnt mean brand new, if I havnt heard before it's new to me lol)

CHALLENGE: I think todays post is a good example if "it's the little things that count". Hearing a brand new song or experiencing an artist I have never heard before is relatively a small thing, but it makes me really happy to experience new music. It makes me happy and I love it. So remember to appreciate the little things that make you happy. And also, try something new, experiencing new things really is fun and you never know what you might find :]

Key to Forgiveness

Yes I missed yesterday, but I've come up with this thought. Whenever I miss, just know that I had a good reason and that I will make up for it the next day. I say this also because this weekend will be another weekend that I will not be posting because I will be away. As far as yesterday goes I had a good reason see I was at church all day at this working retreat getting all the things ready for the actual retreat this weekend and by the time I got home it was like 11:52 and what I was thankful for, especially yesterday, was way to important to me to just throw it together in 8 minutes.

So today and yesterday's blog is about how Im thankful for friendship. Now I have a lot of friends, and they are all kinds of friends. The girls I work with are my friends but well I only see them at work hahha but they still my friends. Friends from school, friends from old schools like high school or elementary who I still keep in touch with. Friends who I hang out and have fun with, and ok I dont know if this is just me, but every now and then I meet someone who I guess is just exactly like me (as far as sarcasm and making everything funny) and so literally not a single word that we say to each other is serious at all! From the second we see each other till we leave and on fb or txt....ALWAYS messin and bein mean to each other. I dont think I would consider these people "friends" cuz we never have friend moments but I just think it's funny when I mhave people like that in my life hahhaha

But last night I was reminded of one of the BEST type of friends I have....the kind of friends that you can cry with.....And what means more to me, the kind of friends that you can cry with and then within minutes be back to laughing and messing with each other and acting like "no we didnt just have a moment and cry and remind each other how much we love each other" lol....but forever and always those moments even if you don't talk about them specifically again, will always be in your heart and you'll always know who you can really count on when you need someone to talk to, or someone to hold you, or someone to pray for/with you.

The second thing I'm thankful for, is still talking about friends but this time it's more specific to what my friends tell me. Im thankful to have friends who love me and truly want to help me when I need help. Im thankful that yesterday one of my friends reminded me that the most important part in moving on with your life after you have made a mistake, is to forgive yourself for it. Of course you should be sorry and apologize, but after you've apologized and even after the person has forgiven you , we still sometimes beat ourselves up for what we did. I'm thankful I was reminded of this, because we all have those things on our conscious that always seem to bug us but we need to let them go and accept that we did wrong but that we are sorry and let ourselves move on from our own mistakes.

CHALLENGE: We all have things in our past and in our lives that we may not be particularly proud of, and Im talking about things we have done or caused. Or situations that we can't really let go of. Im not gonna tell you to let it go cause I know it's not that easy. But I will challenge you to try to let it go, and realize that the past is over and you cant go back to it anymore. You can only try your hardest to make right now the best and to make decisions to be a good person right now. One of the things I learned yesterday was that if we have faith God will always forgive us and all we can do is truly want to change for the better, but usually we are the ones that can not forgive ourselves. We need to forgive ourselves sometimes and allow ourselves to move on and be better people. Start over again.

Every Year

....Tomorrow I have to wake up at 5:30 am to go to my church hall to help make breakfast for about 30 or so peer leaders. I have to be there from 7am till 10pm making posters, directing skits and a bunch of work that needs to be done before the retreat next week. I'm sure it's gonna be a roller coaster of emotions and tempers at times hahah, we're gonna realize something isnt working and people might get a little stressed, and I will be BEYOND tired by the time I get home.....I am actually thankful for all of this lol

Every year a week before the retreat we have this working retreat which is exactly what I just explained. It's mentally and physically draining but honestly it also is a lot of fun...in it's own way I guess hahaha. The past 3 weeks we've been having meetings once a week and yes a lot of things have been getting done but to be completely honest it's been more planning and figuring out what needs to be done, however tomorrow will be actually doing what needs to be done. To me the meetings are fun and way to get use to working with each other and to build that trust and friendship but tomorrow I actualy feel productive and accomplished hahaha

All I know is that every year I hear people, INCLUDING MYSELF, complain about how they dont wanna wake up so early and be there ALL DAY making posters, practicing skits over and over and over again, and how tired they are during the day and they just wanna nap (how many of you are scared to go tomorrow now?? lol)...but at the end of the day ALWAYS!...it all comes together and we're thankful for the time together and I'm not sure how to explain but, I mean put it this way...I always come back, and so do A LOT of other people. So tomorrow will be a tiring day and I explain how hard it's gonna be to hopefuly also make you think that if it's so hard and tiring WHY GO THROUGH WITH IT!?.....well exactly what I want people to think about...why? Because it's worth it to see how amazing the retreat turns out, its worth it to see all the peer leaders especially the new ones experience the behind the scenes to their retreat. And to me the biggest reason.......spending time with these people always makes me happy, we're bonded through faith and all that we've been through together and the love I have for what I do...causes me to forget how tired I was from doing this the year before so I come back every year :]

CHALLENGE: There are things or maybe even people in our lives that have this incredible ability to make us go crazy sometimes....and yet we continue to love them and help them and voluntarily be around them. Usually it's because we love them enough that it's ok if they drive us insane. All the great times we have with them, completely over power any moments of uneasiness. So the next time you get stressed or frustrated or irritated by someone you love....remember why you love them, breathe and get over it hahaha i knwo it's ahrder than that but you get what I mean haha    

Signs of Hope

Today in the midst of confusion and regret and not really knowing if I'm making all the right decisions, I am thankful for the little signs God sends us that let us know that we're doing SOMETHING right..and to just keep on going.

You know how when you're trying to help but you're not sure if you're actually helping or just making thinsg worse. And then randomly someone comes up to you and says thank you cause you helped them a lot and you get really happy cause you realize you are doing something right...yeah I love those moments haha

I do these retreats and stuff that I've been talking about because I love helping people and it's just amazing to know what someone has gone through and see them change and grow and these retreats are just a constant reminder of what life is really about and being so close to my faith during these times (I mean I try to always stay close to my faith but during retreat time it definitley is enhanced lol ) is honestly a great feeling to me. But I don't really help out on these retreats or at my church for any other reason other than I want to help someone open their eyes to how beautiful life is really. You don't do this expecting anything in return and honestly I do it to help out the other people create the retreat but I never really go into these things thinking "im gonna help someone" like I dont know I just do what I do haha

Tonight we had to answer the questions in who do you see God's love and in who do you see God's work...and people came up to me afterwards and told me that I was their answer to these questions, and I love evryone and I'm friends with everyone there but it was people who I just had no clue thought of me that way hahha it was cool to hear that though and again was a good reminder that Im doing something good there and that this is exactly where I need to be rigth now :]

CHALLENGE: Maybe some of you already have a time in your mind where something like this happened to you. And then theres some of you who are tempted to feel bad because you feel you've never gotten a sign like this. But I challenge you to think, maybe you just dont want to accept the sign sometimes. When you're feeling lost, and you want a sign hey sometimes you gotta ask for the sign but more importantly you have to be open to it and be able to recognize it when it comes.

Realizing what's important

You know those times where you're feeling a certain way and you cant quite explain it and then that perfect song starts playing?? hahha yeah I love those moments. Whether it's your to happy for words or you're sad, or you're just not exactly sure what you are but the second that perfect song starts playing...everything seems to make sense again, even if it's only for those few minutes the song is playing.

That kind of happened today. Lately a lot of things have been happening (not all necessarily bad) but just a lot is happening. A lot of things that I don't really know the answer to, or how to solve them and that frustrates me even more! It's kind of been one of those weeks or few weeks where everything seems to be going a little out of wack, and everyone seems on edge and I'm honestly not the dramatic kind to say "my world is falling apart"..cause it's not but a lot of things seem to be going wrong one after the other and its stressful at times. I have felt like "removing" myself from the situation (as in being around people) might be the best option to get away from the chaos/drama, but then I realized something.

I have a lot of random burnt CD's with no name in them so I have no clue what songs are on them and i decided to try to figure some out today and when i put on the first CD it had the song "So Small" by Carrie Underwood. 

Now if you've heard this song there is no need to expain any further but for those that maybe havn't. Listen to the song. "Sometimes that mountain you've been climbing is just a grain  of sand. What you've been out there searching for forever is in your hand. And when you figure out Love is all that matters after all, it sure makes everything else seem so small"......We give problems way more attention and importance than they deserve. I love this song because not only does it remind me whats important in my own life but it kind of has the message Im trying to show through this blog. When you realize what is really important, all the good things in your life whether it be people or whatever, everything else that isnt "good" does not really matter much as long as you focus on the good. "what you got if you aint got love, the kind that you just want to give away"...removing myself from the situation would mean removing myself from people I love, people that love me and would also mean "not caring"....and if I cant love and care about my friends then really, I have nothing. "I know it's hard on a rainy day, you wanna shut the world out and just be left alone, but dont run out on your faith"....this I was definitly feeling a lot today! Like I just needed to get away for a while but again that would require leaving people that honeslty would be the only ones who could make me feel stress-free again. My faith, family and my friends are the what matters the most, and my faith will always get me through hard times.
Hearing this song today really made me realize that all these little things that seem to keep going wrong, are nothing but little bumps in the road. And that the answer is never to run away from my faith or my friends, because in the end they are the ones that make everything ok again. They are what's important in my life.

CHALLENGE: I could go through each and every single line in this song and explain why it is amazing but instead I'll have you listen to it and hopefully you'll get the same message. It's ok to be stressed out but don't push away your faith or your loved ones. And everynow and then maybe you'll realize that this HUGE problem that you're letting yourself get wrapped up in is really only a grain of sand. Realize what's important. Have a little faith.

Laughter :D

Now I'm sure that we all have things that we dont really like about ourselves. However, there are also things we do like about ourselves and it is perfectly ok to aknowledge  those things we love. Yes there is a point where constantly talking about what we love about ourselves is annoying, narcissistic, and at times selfish. But I cant personally say that I dont brag about myself pretty much ever but there is certain thing I am thankful about myself and so I want to share one of them today.

What I am thankful about myself today is a personality trait or characteristic about me I guess. See the thing about me is I can laugh at any situation! I mean I can and pretty much do laugh at anything hahaha. Of course it has some "bad" things like wanting to laugh when someone is crying, or when something serious is happening. And yes I know to all my "psychologists" out there I am perfectly aware that this is a defense mechanism when I dont feel like really dealing with an issue or with the "seriousness" of a problem I find a way to laugh about it. I know it's my own way of dealing and at times, not dealing, with things haha but at the same time I love that I can find the humor in just about anything, as well as I have a decent control of time and place as far as there are somethings you just should not laugh about.

But today I'm focusing on the positive part of having this "trait".....I think people don't laugh enough in this life. I laugh at my life all the time!! hahah I believe it is important to laugh at how ridiculous your life can be sometimes. I mean it's a lot better than sitting around crying about it! But the thing is it's not even me "avoiding feeling something" I genuinely think "drama" is soo funny! Now im not a jerk and Im not gonna just joke about someones drama, life, or problems in their face. I wait until they have reached a point where they can look back and laugh about what happened and then I make them laugh by making fun of their situation lol.....Honestly when you have seen the amount of drama, and problems as I have either with my own life or through the lives of people that are close to me, you get a very good perspective of what is a REAL PROBLEM and what is just "silly high school drama" (which does not only happen in high school, that's just what its called lol) So many times even if things feel like "the end of the world" I tend not to stress about it to much. I respect that to others it is a "huge deal" and they don't know what to do, but in my head I can't help but think "c'mon....you gotta admit it's kinda funny!" hahahhahaha

So there's is A LOT more to my personality and the idea that I can laugh at anything kind of goes hand in hand with my sarcasm but if you know me you know that sarcasm is such a big part of who I am that it needs a blog all its own so we'll save that topic haha. But I am thankful that there is something in me, experience, understanding, I really dont know what it is, but there is something in me that allows me to put things in perspective and be able to laugh at hard moments in my life rather than get all upset about them. As well as being able to help others see the "funny" in their own troubles and make themn realize what really is worth getting stressed about and what is not. I love that I can remind people to laugh at themselves.

I also have to add that I LOVE and i am very appreciative of the people around me who understand that I laugh at everything. Even when things are serious, sad, or scary....I laugh but my close friends and family know that it's just how I react sometimes. :)

CHALLENGE: Well first off, don't be afraid to be thankful for the type of person you are. Again there is a line you don't want to cross but it's ok to aknowledge your good attributes hahah. So just think of something about you (preferably not physical lol) that you like about yourself. Maybe it's the complete opposite of mine, and thats cool! I'm not a "cryer" really again I more laugh at things, but maybe you are a "cryer" and that is something to be thankful for as well. The fact that you can allow yourself to get to that emotion I mean there are times where I wish I could cry instead of having to hide my mouth cause the laughter is about to burst out! I know people that love that they can cry. So it can be anything!

LAS VEGAS!!!

So I decided to roll up this Vegas weekend into one post. I mean this weekend away was exactly what I needed. Just us girls, having fun laughing soo much that my stomach was hurting and making so many memories...oh and this was all before even leaving the driveway!! hahaha

Yeah we're all in the car and my cousin, the driver, says "So how do we get to Vegas?"....off to a great start right?! lol it was a lot of fun, and it was my first time going to vegas as a 21 year old and with no parents, actually it was all 5 of our's first time. It was nice planning our own trip for the fist time. And believe it or not we were actually VERY RESPONSIBLE with money!! hahah and we took care of each other and we had fun and we all made it back home safe and sound! :)

It was all I love bunched up into one weekend. ROAD TRIP!!, Family, Friends, time away from the chaos, and well....VEGAS! lol

Not gonna go into detail about vegas but I will say that I (as well as my wallet) appreciated being a girl SO MUCH this weekend haha getting into the clubs for free was not bad at all! Now I dont want any of my people from home to get sad cause I had such a great time away from them. I missed you all very much!

hahahha oh and I have to share that I knew I had gotten too use to Vegas when I started to show the cashier at panda express my ID when I got lunch today and then realized I dont need to be 21 to eat Chinese food hahhahhahah.....

To sum up Im thankful for, my friends and family that I can always have a GREAT time with, thankful that my parents (even though they hesitated at first) let me go to Vegas, and Im thankful for the amazing, fun and very memorable weekend I had

M.I.A.

So just thought I would let you guys know that I will be gone this weekend because I'm going to Vegas for my cousins 21st birthday. This "announcement" is for the people who literally text me asking why I have not posted my blog yet if it's already late in the night hahah I highly doubt I will be around internet long enough to sit down and type my thankful post. HOWEVER!! When I get back I will post 3 (Friday, Saturday and Sunday) when I have the chance I promise...so yeah jus heads up haha

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND EVERYONE!! :)

Busy Busy Busy

I have to say as much as I love peace and calmness, today I felt very happy about how busy my life is right now. I have meetings with people pretty much everyother day, have a lot of things to do in not so much time, still have to call people back since last saturday but cant because the conversation requires at least an hour of privacy which I have not had so that's been pushed back. But again today for some reason I actually got the feeling that I love being busy, maybe not in general but for right now I am enjoying it.

I guess it just makes me feel like Im accomplishing something by working hard and getting things done. I honestly don't see it as "stressful" because it is something I love to do. The reason im extra busy these days is because of this retreat that I am helping out with . I've talked about  it before how I volunteer at my church as a junior minister and the retreat is coming up. Again as busy as I am, and as many things as I have to get done in such a small amout of time......I love it. Because it's something that means a lot to me. I know what my retreat ment to me and how much I really enjoyed it, and so putting on these retreats for the students is important to me.
 It's one of those things that takes forever, and a lot of energy and late nights and some all nighters at times but once you see the result you completely forget how hard or "stressful" it might have been to get there because it is always worth it to see how many kids actually get something amazing out of this retreat.

CHALLENGE: Continue to be thankful in your life especially to the small things in life. When there is something you love to do, dont let anyhting ruin the happiness you get from it even if it can be "stressful" at times...remember why it is that you love it.

Thank God!

OH MY GOSH!!!!! So im sitting here at my desk trying to think of what to write about today when I decide to grab my water from my bedside little counter hahah and guess what I saw???? So my lamp top the like cover part had disconnected from the bulb so instead of the metal part being hooked onto the bulb, it was just the cloth cover part hanging on the bulb. And I dont knwo how long my lamp has been on but it had already burned through and had made a big circle of just burnt crisp cloth. Basically at the point where anysecond and my room would have caught fire!

I swear I dont know what it is but im pretty prone to accidents ahhah actually im prone to almost disasters, that somehow thank God I always avoid but just barely! If you read my "Guardian Angels" blog you get more of a back ground on my history of close calls like tonight. So then my mom came in to see why I was on the compuer in pitch blackness in my room (cause you can bet I turned that thing off real quick! ) and she saw and she just helped me throw the cover, which was permanently attached to the bulb now, in the trash with out my dad seeing lol. Now she is not helping me lie to my father, she simply knows how to "pick your battles" and it just was not the rigth time to tell my dad I almost burned the house down. Which in my defense would have been a total ACCIDENT!

But again I am thankful that I saw it before anything bad really did happen, and im thankful for my understanding mother who helped me out with it hahahah

CHALLENGE: Todays post was in a way light hearted, but still something to be thankful for. It doesnt always have to be a huge life changing thing just a simple thought that you know you are thankful for maybe it made you smile, laugh, or it saved your life and house. Those "thank God" moments, even though we say it out of instinct and habit. Well, really make sure you atke time to thank God for whatever it is that happened even if it was a small little thing.

Family Time

Today I am thankful for how close my family is. I mean I use to think that all families were like mine but as I grew up and met other families I learned that that's not true. There are MANY different types of families and to me that is beautiful and honestly I have many families(school,church, etc..) as well and I love that because no matter where I am, I am always surounded by family I love.

But I am talking about my blood family today. As I said my sister is visiting rigth now from Chicago and so today we had dinner with my cousin and it was a good time. As always!! hahahha The reason I say I'm thankful for how close we all are is because I love the fact that we always make time for each other and we honestly do have each others backs. Everyone had crazy schedules but we all made a little time and canceled some stuff to have this cousin family time together that again, we grew up with. My family raised all of us this way. As I have said in the past my family honestly does not go more than a week without meeting up for something or other and I love that! I know there are people who are not too close with their blood families or cousins and so I am very thankful that we all love each other and love spending time with each other. Now I have A LOT of cousins and I love them all with all my heart! but there is one cousin who my older sister and I have always been a little closer too. His name is Eric. Now all of us cousins are close now that we're older and we hang out together but growing up the older cousins did ther own thing and so my sister, eric and me would always do our own thing together. If you spend enough time with either of us and then meet another one of us, within minutes it is beyond obvious that we grew up together and that we're close hahahhahha we laugh at mostly the same stuff, have the same sense of humor, and compliment each others personalities very well lol.

Family story time! hahahh we (Eric Beni and myself) use to put on little plays for the family during different holidays. The one EVERYONE always remembers is the thanksgiving play we did one year. I was pretty little but i do remember bits and pieces of it. Beni narrated, Eric was the pilgrim and I..................I was the turkey. BUT I WAS THE BEST DANG TURKEY EVER!! lol We use to play ninja turtles hahah aahhh man just had a crazy trip down memory lane! awww I had a good childhood and its mostly thanks to my family and cousins that made it fun cause we always had fun together.

      This is Eric, me, and Beni when we were really REALLY little hahhahah

 CHALLENGE: No matter what kind of family you have, there is someone if not many someones haha in our families that has always been there for us and that we love. Someone that when we look back on memories, they are always part of them and they made us who we are in some ways. Now yes we ALL have those tramatizing fmaily stories that we don't liek to think about as well, but forget those and take this time to think and remember a good time. Appreciate them, and if you dont already do this then maybe try setting up some sort of cousin (or whatever) lunch/dinner thing. Make time for family! :]



SURPRIIIISE!!!

So last night I pretty much got NO SLEEP! Had a lot on my mind and just could not get myself to go to sleep, so I was not planning on waking up too early you know haha

But my sister came down this week from Chicago as a surprise to my mom. Well a surprise to a lot of people actually haha I'm not sure who knew and didnt know but I knew haha. So I woke up to the sound of my little sisters screaming and cheering because they were so surprised and excited when they saw her. She like ran up to the door and started ringing the bell like a crazy woman and when my mom and sisters opened the door they didnt even know what to say hahha it was really cool though.

So me and her went out for happy hour tonight and just hung out and tomorrow we're going out again with another cousin and just a full week of activities and good times haha. I'm thankful for this because I thought it was really nice to see my mom genuinley surprised and happy to see my sister. Plus I could definitley use a week of family dinners and movie nights like we use to have and just a nice way to take my mind off of other things that are going on rigth now. So Im thankful for my sisters surprise visit :]

Now she is actually waiting for me to go start the first movie we gonna see...I'll give you a hint "and yoouuu, doin that thing you doooo!" if you dont know what Im sayin......look it up hahahhah

CHALLENGE: Appreciate your family and make the best out of the time you have with them. I never really understood when people complained about family parties. I love my family time! :]

My Friend

..................Yes, yes I know I did not post anything yesterday and I know it's ok and it's not a crazy big deal but remember I have a big competitive side to me and well the fact that I missed one day when I actually went 3 weeks (which for me is an accomplishment lol) you know....kinda not happy bout that hahahha

But alright here is my second post of today to make up for yesterday. Now one of the things I noticed about this blog of mine is that it kinda doubles as what Im thankful for and also things that make me really happy. which makes sense cause we SHOULD  be very thankful for all the things that make us happy right? That and the other day at a retreat meeting the adults were talking about "Bad days" and giving the peer leaders ways to try to focus on the good and you know kinda what I'm trying to do with this blog haha. And one of the adults (steph <3 ) started asking us of a list of things that make us happy and well my mind went to my blog and everything Ive said so far that Im thankful for. So anyways hahah yesterday was a good day!

I hang out with some friends and normally we watch movies and laugh at them haha but last night we decided to start telling scary stories and it kinda just turned into a sharing session on ANY story you wanted to tell haha but it was a lot of fun. And it made me happy and again just reminded me of how much friends in general mean to me. We all have friends some of us more than others but we all have at least one (but most likely more) but at least one friend who always makes us smiel and who we LOVE hanging out with. I'm thankful for ALL OF MY FRIENDS...yeah ll 2 of you hahah just kidding I have more I swear......hahhaha

CHALLENGE: The next time you feel down and you catch yourself saying "life sucks" think of your friends. What we don't exist anymore? They do and they are reason enough to be happy in life.

Sunday!!

I love Sunday mornings! Now I go to the 6:30pm mass but my parents go to the 8am spanish mass and so do my aunts and uncles and my grandparents as well (sometimes I go with them too). But even if i don't wake up early with them they always call me after mass to wake up so I can get ready to go to breakfast with the fam bam :]

Are spot is NORMS, and it always has been and it always will be haha but if my sister has to alter serve at 9:45 and we cant go to breakfast with the family we just go somewhere else just us 5. But I love Sunday breakfast with my family it's always fun and nice haha. And just in general Sundays to me are always happy and chill days.

Especially Sundays like this one where after a few days of rain it is sunny and bright and you look outside and you can just feel the good times! hahahha like right now my mom is laughing and having a great time talking to her sisters in Mexico, the girls are watching a movie silently which is amazing! lol, my dad is helping my mom make soup (Caldo de Camaron Mmm! ) cause my aunt and cousins are coming over later today and Im in my room listening to music chilling and writting this hahah. Just could not be happier right now and I really think you should enjoy moments of happiness to the FULLEST!

CHALLENGE: Appreciate the good moments in the day. I don't think we should look at a day as a whole, but rather look at it in sections or in moments. It's not fair to say it was a "bad day" just because the last few hours were bad even though morning, noon, and most of the afternoon were good. Or just because morning was bad but the rest of the day was great or whatever you know? Take each moment as it comes and dont let other moments spill into the rest of the day. Just cause morning sucked dont be upset at lunch time...give each moment the chance to be great which means let go of other things. Unless its happiness, thats ok to let spill into the rest of yoru day hahah. I hope everyone has a GREAT Sunday. :]

Singin' In the Rain

So it's raining today, or it rained today cause it's close to the end of the day but it's still raining so....yeah it's raining today...

I'm not one of those people who can say that "I LOVE THE RAIN!", or "I HATE THE RAIN!"...Honestly I havnt decided if I love it or hate it. Hate and Love are both very strong words. Sometimes rain is good but you have to admit it can cause troubles at times also. But usually I do like the rain and enjoy it, and I don't mind getting caught in the rain, it's just water,and it's actually a lot of fun :]  But I am thankful for the time inside the rain gives me.

Maybe some people hate being stuck inside their houses and normally Im one of them but on rainy days, I dont really have much of a choice I guess. And I usually make the best of being stuck inside all day. I love writting so I get to catch up on that creative side of me that I never have time to excercise cause im always to busy to sit and think and write normally. Also I learned how to play some songs on the piano during some rainy days. But honeslty I think it's being able to wear sweatpants and sweatshirts and get the fireplace on and just be all cozy all day that I really enjoy! Plus I do love the sound of rain and looking at the rain, but not in a depressed or sad sort of way but rather in a....I honeslty think rain is kinda cool kinda way hahha. I know I sound like a dork and thats fine lol but looking at the rain, especially if it's a lot of rain like building up into big puddles I find it fasinating and fun hahaha. 

So I love this song and this movie and honestly who doesnt get this song stuck in their head a rainy day? lol well I do so..ENJOY! LOL

CHALLENGE: So I know many people say they don't like the rain, and if that's the case then don't think of the rain but rather think of the time it gives you to do things at home. Or if you do like the rain then maybe you dont like being stuck at home, but that's just cause you're focusing on being "bored", but don't do that hahah Just be creative with your time get warm, watch your favorite movie, or draw or write....Sometime we need a little "being bored" time to really relax...

No Excuses

So I said before that my mom and I have recently joined a gym. I love the gym, for those who know me you know that I can have a bit of a temper on me....just a tiny one though haha. But honestly that's just part of who I am. I am competitive, (like everyone) I don't enjoy losing to much and yeah haha. When I was younger I use to play a lot of sports and that would always help me release energy and stress you know, it was good for me. But I havnt played sports like on an actual team in a long time so going to the gym now has helped me alot with just feeling happy and not feeling like so stressed you know. And of course it's better fore my health and all that combined is great. However, eventhough all these reason are valid reason to why I love going to the gym there is one more specific reason why I love my particular gym :]

My gym is your normal everyday gym. It has trainers and all the machines you can think of and people of all ages go there! But the gym is connected to a senior living center. So there is a few more seniors there than in a normal gym I guess. But they are awesome!! haha Straight there is this old lady who goes everyday, and she has her little oxygen breathing machine with her. She's there with her oxygen tubes in her nose doing her excercises. This other lady is in one of those like scooters (not reallya  wheelchair but she cant walk without so kind of the same idea) but she still goes everyday to do her weights! Then there's this one old man comes in like takes him forever to walk from the entrance to the locker room, he has a cane and he is there right next to me doing the rowing machine!! Now obviously there not dong INTENSE workouts like the rest of us and they go for like 20 minutes and they're out but still, everyday they go for at least a little while! There's others too these are just the ones i see all the time. Oh and I dont say "old man" or "old lady" in a mean way I say it as a term of endearment haha seriously these people are my heroes right now!

I am thankful for them at my gym because they remind me of one simple rule in life....NO EXCUSES! Seriously I can't wake up and say "oh I feel sick", or "I'm tired today", or whatever because well....with ALL THE RESPECT...they cant breathe and they still go to the gym!!! I literally have no excuse to not go to the gym when I have plenty of time in the mornings! They are my motivation to get my butt to the gym everyday and keep myself healthy. And well you know you have to take the lessons you learn and spread them to all parts of your life And that's what I want to do with this lesson. You can't not do good thinsg in life, or things that might seem hard or scary just becasue you are afraid to be out of your comfort zone. This might seem "mean" but either you do it or you don't, either you succeed or you dont but dont make a bunch of excuses. Just live with the choice and with the outcome. It's ok to lose or to fail a few times by the way...that's how you learn and grow. I'm just saying we need to except when we have fallen short either because we tried and it did not work out (which then we can learn from our mistakes) or we did not give it our all. You can't blame other people for your life, it's your life.

If you know what you have to do to make things "right" and if you CAN do these things(sometime we need to recognize that we can't), then you should do them. In school, at work, at home with family, with friends, or in your own individual person. No Excuses, do what you have to do and no blaming everyone else.

So thank you old people, elderly people, wiser people (whatever you want to call them hahah) at my gym, you motivate me to continue this new life style I'm trying that involves more than just going to the gym and even though it is hard for me at time because as I've said long projects lose my interest at times haha, you have reminded...NO EXCUSES

CHALLENGE: I think this one is pretty self explanitory...In anything you have to do in life. School work, job work, or just in general bettering you life, yeah trust me I know it's hard but it can be done. So just remember this week and hopefully for the rest of your life...Do what you know you have to do, no excuses.

Canceled Class

There's not much personal growth or spiritual growth and anything significant about todays post hahah.
Today my last class of the day got canceled and I got to go home early...not before visiting my choir girls tho! hahah

Sometimes it doesnt have to be some big huge emotional thing that you are thankful for in life. It's the little simple pleasures that give the best "warm moments" haha So short and simple tonight. Im thankful that every now and then for whatever reason teachers cancel class which is always a great surprise hahaha

CHALLENGE: Enjoy the simple things. they may not be life changing, and you may not remember them tomorrow but for the moment they take place something as simple as a canceled class which means a free afternoon...that was awesome! haha

Today Was A Good Day!

I'm not completely sure how to explain what I'm thankful for today. I'm thankful for the Peace in my life today. Usually at least once a day the little ones do somehting that I have to intervein. For example they start fighting with each other, or they fight me cause they dont want to do their homework. Or something happens with one of my friends that causes me to worry, or just in general with going to school, doing homework and and taking care of my little sisters and the everyday drama that seems to never be to far away haha you know the days can get hectic and chaotic at times.

You get that feeling like you are just dead tired by the time you get home and sit down and it's not really a peaceful tired it's a "omgosh what a loooong day!!" kind of tired, like you are over worked or over stressed. The past few weeks there has been some stuff happening with my friends that causes some stress from time to time, but it's a good stress I think hahah it's more like concern, it's the kind of thing that happens when you really love someone so it's ok haha and school and family stress is a normal thing. I have to be honest and say that there has been some tention lately with certain people in my life and I've been angry with them and lettin the situation with them kind of follow me (like I think about it to much). And well being angry at someone so much for a long time it gets stressful, so yeah.

But something about today felt really really peaceful. I woke up, went to the Gym, came home cleaned my room, had lunch, took a shower, chilled for 30 minutes, went to work, came home fed the girls, went to yag and now Im here jus chillin again. haha The girls behaved all day, parents are chill today, I dont know I just felt realy happy and relaxed and peaceful today. I mean my life is not a ball of stress but again lately Ive been tensed up by some stuff so it was really nice to feel peace today and Im just not really sure how to exaplin it. All I know is that I needed a day like today and I am very thankful for it.....maybe it was the light rain we had hahah i dont know, but just need to make sure I say. God, thank you for today and the peace Ive been feeling all day, it was a good reminder of the peacefulness of letting go of your problems and not letting people make you angry and such but rather just pray for them and live your own life so...Thank you!

CHALLENGE: Let go of your problems, even if it's just for one day. Try to feel that peace and I guess what Im trying to say is that if you're having a good day? LET YOURSELF HAVE A GOOD DAY! sometimes we are so caught up in whats wrong that we force ourselves to think of negative stuff even when nothing bad has happened today. Breathe, relax and dont anticipate bad things happening, be peaceful and let what needs to happen, happen. And when you do have a good day or a good moment, make sure you take the time to thank God for it. :]

EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON

Hey! Alright so actually a few things to talk about today! First..HAPPY VALENTINES DAY! Now if you don't have a Valentine dont you dare get depressed and feel bad for yourself now! Remember this is a positive blog, where we think of what we ARE blessed to have not to think of what for whatever reason we don't have. (Cause sometimes we may not realize it but not having something even if we really want it, is a blessing). If you dont have a significant other, what are you gonna do? You cant "hide" from a day, it's.......a day! I know it can get depressing if you see other people constanlty post all their lovey dovey stuff on this day hahhaha be happy for those people! They found someone they love and want to share their life with right now. Step number one to being a happy person, is being able to be happy for other people, not Jealous.

So you don't have someone, personally I think the first step to being able to "have someone" is to realize that you don't need someone. You have to be happy with who you are as an idividual person in order to really be happy with someone else! Cause if not then you end up looking at relationships as some sort of "therapy" for you to be happy and you have way to much dependancy on them like you can not live without them. Yeah it's romantic to think that way but it's just not true. You will survive just fine without a significant other. Plus Valentines day can be celebrated with people you love and people who love you, not only with "significant others". But just be happy with who you are as a person, understand that you are ok alone(even though you never really are alone), and give it time. The right person will come along.

SECONDLY: Just wanted to point out that you can be thankful for the same thing multiple days hahahah. I mean I know Im trying to go the longest I can without repeating stuff, but just cause I wrote about my mom 3 weeks ago doesnt mean Im not thankful for her everyday! (Especially today cause she bought me food and when I got home from school starving it was a great surprise! ) lol. I say that because sometimes there are people who struggle with realizing all they are thankful for. But you can not tell me there is not at least ONE thing you are perfectly aware that you are thankful for. So if you genuinely can only think of one thing, then you be thankful for that one thing everysingle day! But now, we get to what Im thankful for today hahhaa

I am thankful that sometimes we don't have control over things we REALLY want control over. Now in my life I'm really big on Self control, and the idea of taking responsibility for what you do and the fact that we always have choices. So the idea that I can't control everything is definitley scary for me, but even if I dont like not having control of a situation, I have to admit many times that's for the better. I say this because this year my little sisters had to go to a different school. Now this does not seem so bad or crazy but the school they had to leave is the school where ALL the grandchildren so far have gone to. I honeslty don't know dates and I'm sure my cousins will appreciate that I don't haha But the oldest grandchildren who first attended this school are married and one has a son. So we've been part of this school for many years and also part of the parish there. It is a huge part of our life and we love it. So it was hard to not drop them off at that school anymore, and picking them up was weird because I was so use to knowing EVERYONE! My little sisters did not want to leave, I did not want them to leave, my Mom did not want them to leave, but because of certain reasons my parents decided it was better for my little sisters to go to a different school at least for a while. One of my little sisters needed extra help with understanding some material and the new school offered that help. It was hard, people cried the first few weeks at the new school, and the little ones still say they miss the old school.

But today they went to visit the old school (which by the way is still our parish so we didnt just "leave" it completely hahah but still it was hard for them not seeing their friends and stuff). And my mom told me that when they got home they were really happy they got to see their friends and they had a great time! And that my sister was really excited to tell my mom that she listened in on some of their classes and that she already learned what they were learning and that when no one else knew the answer to a few quetions she raised her hand and knew the right answer. And she also already learned what they were learning in math, so much so that she actually taught the class how to do a certain math problem! She was sooo happy and confident that she knew the material and knew the answers! It honeslty was a great moment for a lot of people but the fact that she wasnt afraid to answer or that she wasnt nervous about the teacher calling on her but rather WANTED to answer, that just makes me very happy to know that she is getting the rigth help she needed and that she is confident in her own intelligence. It also proved to my parents and me that they made the right choice. It didnt always feel like the right choice and it sure as heck was not the easy choice, but it helped my little sisters a lot and will help them in the future as well. See if I had control of this, they would have NEVER left the school. But THANK GOD I had no choice in it hahhaha.

Everything happens for a reason in this case we got to see the reason a year later, but sometimes you never see the reason, you just have to know that there is one. It's hard to understand you have no control of certain things, and it might hurt to make a decision sometimes but in the end, the hardest decisions to make can be the right ones. Just have faith.

CHALLENGE: Be happy for those around you and for all the blessings they have in their life! Constantly remember what you are thankful for. And have faith, let go of what you cant control, and just know that Everything Happens for a Reason. You may not always see the reason, but the challenge is to have faith. 

SMILE!!

You know what's a good problem to have, having so many things to be thankful for that I cant choose which one I want to write about tonight, now that's a GREAT problem haha

But I have decided to go with the first thing that I thought of so yeah haha. Today I'm thankful for the opportunity to be a Eucharistic Minister. For those that don't know what that is, it is the person who gives out the bread and the wine at church or the body and blood of Christ rather haha. There's definitley a lot behind being a Eucharistic Minister but the reason I feel thankful for it today is because I get to smile at everyone.

See back when I first got trained for this the guy who was teaching us said something that has stuck with me through out these past few years that I've been doing this. He said when you're handing people the bread or wine, make eye contact with them and make sure you smile. He continued by saying it's important to him, to smile at everyone and make that eye contact because you never know who you might be looking at. Maybe you are the only person who smiles at them that day or possibly the only person they really have contact with that day. I mean church definitley is a place where people think and contemplate their lives and  pray if they are having troubles so a smile may be just what they need from someone. That lesson always stuck with me, because it's true, one time a girl came to me when I was giving the bread and she just looked at the ground never at me, and she seemed like awkward almost like she didnt know how to react to me. I dont know it just makes me think that maybe there are some people who im the only person who smiles at them that day and so I make sure Im always smiling when I give out the Eucharist, cause you just never know.
And im thankful because I get to smile at people and possibly help someone else smile for the day :]

CHALLENGE: Make sure you smile at people, strangers walking by, if you happen to make eye contact, just make sure you smile. Cause I agree you never know who may need a smile that day.